go frost yourself

Kate Hudson & Matthew McConaughey were the only two reasons I wanted to see this film, because after witnessing the coming attractions I realized it was gonna be pretty lame. . .but I had no idea, no clue whatsoever, that it would be as patently pathetic as it actually turned out.

The "plot", of course, was regurgitatingly ridiculous, but I can deal with a paltry premise if it's at least played out in a relatively clever way. There is not one clever moment in this movie, alas and alack, and although Hudson is adorable even when she's being more obnoxious than Joe Dirt (she gives Matthew's male member the monicker of Princess Sophia, for instance, and she sabotages his boys-only poker game in such foul ways that they cannot be described without resorting to severely inappropriate 4-letter words), and although Matt of course is dangerously and disgustingly attractive, this just aint enough to justify this tastelessly trashy travesty, which ends really really badly, subjecting their peers (at their devastastingly dreary "frost-yourself" diamonds advertising campaign party) to an astoundingly embarrassing duet (yes, they're SINGING by the end of this treachery, boys and girls), followed by the token let's-make-up-after-we've-put-each-other-through-the-tortures-of-the-damned-(not-to-mention-the-audience)-because-aw-shucks-we-actually-love-each-other scene.

The good news is, I had more fun writing this review than I had sitting through the movie, and I thank Paramount for giving me this opportunity.